Expecting Motherhood

expecting_motherhood
© Kelli Nelson – kellihood.com

Motherhood. When we’re enthusiastically expecting our first child, we’re undoubtedly not expecting motherhood.

Motherhood is exciting, joyful and ultimately the most rewarding role in a woman’s life. It’s certainly the most important. At the same time, it’s also the most demanding, challenging, stressful, anxiety inducing, frustrating, exhausting…

It is what it is.

When we learn to allow motherhood to be what it is, only then do we find the true wonder. Some of us get it right away, and some of us take a little longer.

We know some days will inevitably be sweeter than others. So we learn to be resourceful and creative. We adjust. And re-adjust. And still, sometimes we forget how to find the prize among the challenges.

Each morning when my 3-year old daughter wakes, she loudly summons me with “Mommy, come and get me!” The first few times she did this, I growled with irritation over her refusal to get up out of bed on her own.

Then it happened.

I walked through the bedroom door to be greeted by the most beautiful little girl I’d ever seen. Arms stretched open wide to hug my neck. A sincerely spoken “Good morning, mommy!” welcomed me and was accompanied by an equally beautiful smile.

This is now our daily routine. It’s my prize. Whatever I’m doing at that time isn’t important. I won’t dare miss out on that sweet moment. I won’t even share it with my husband. I think he gets it. This is my strength later in the day when chaos and tantrums threaten the balance of motherhood, and my sanity.

Motherhood. It’s not what we expect. It’s our toughest job. It’s our greatest accomplishment. And it’s so much more than we can dream. Even on the not so sweet days.

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Comments

  1. says

    So beautiful. And exactly what my 3/4 year old does (she’s been doing it for over a year). And yes, some days I’m so annoyed by it. But this is such a good reminder. Get those hugs early to carry you through the day. The other reminder? It won’t last forever. My 9 year old can attest to that.

    • says

      Missy, you mentioned one of my greatest anxiety-inducing issues: “It won’t last forever.” I know exactly what you mean. My 17 year-old is also a constant reminder!

  2. says

    So beautiful. And exactly what my 3/4 year old does (she’s been doing it for over a year). And yes, some days I’m so annoyed by it. But this is such a good reminder. Get those hugs early to carry you through the day. The other reminder? It won’t last forever. My 9 year old can attest to that.

  3. says

    So beautiful. The post & your little girl. And I needed to read the sentence, “Some of us get it right away and some of us take longer.” I loved it from the get go, but when my second born/only daughter was born, I was reborn myself, I think. I see my grandmother in her. I see myself in her. I see this future wonderful young woman who will (hopefully) call me regularly and laugh and chat and make plans to be together. It’s comforting, therapeutic, life affirming, wonderful.

    My childhood was what it was. No regets. But we did not do the lovey dovey thing when I was a kid. I think I was meant for that kind of interaction, but neither of my folks were comfortable with it (so, I adored my grandma). Anyway, NOW my daughter grumps out of bed, half sleep walks to the part of the house where my husband and I are drinking coffee, and (I’m not sure when this started) I always say, “Morning, sweet love!” whenever I hear her feet. “Morning, mama,” comes next, with a big sleepy smile. No matter what, every morning–NEVER letting anything else that happened get in the way of it, the both of us need it equally. Any time anyone ever hints around that maybe I gave something up to be a mom, I think of that. You don’t really give anything up. You just have to cram more into the same space. Totally worth it. But, I’m me. Others, I get that it’s harder (like my parents).

    • says

      Thanks, Ange. She’s both my greatest strength and my greatest weakness. ;)

      I think many moms need either reaffirmation or the realization that we do “get it.” It’s really not important if we fall into the “right away” or “some of us take longer” category so long as we fall in at some point. I find similarities between our experiences. I could have written about my own daughter the very same sentences you used to describe how you see yours.

      Your contribution here is awesome. Totally appreciated. Thank you for sharing intimate details of your life, motherhood, thoughts.

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